Monday, June 25

Trust Kingfisher

Never trust:
- a man with a handlebar mustache
- a confused card dealer
- a person who never wears anything other than black
- a young person ordering Jager Bombs
- a barfly with implants
- a male over 12 wearing his baseball cap backwards
- a financially successful pastor
- a cocky cop
- a handsome college professsor
- the person everyone else says is really smart
- a woman who won't tell you her age
- a businessman with a giant cowboy hat
- that jerk with a high clearance 4WD truck, doors 3 feet off the ground, but no mud stains
- a chick with a pierced eyebrow
- anyone with more than 4 tattooes
- that S.O.B. you just don't trust for no specific reason, especially if he has a big truck, 5 tattooes, a backwards baseball cap, a handlebar mustache, and drinks Jager Bombs

Sometimes trust:
- your gut
- your mother
- your dog
- a child's answer
- Grandpa's advice
- your barber
- the bartender
- your enemy
- probability
- a stripper

Always trust:
-
-
-

7 comments:

Craver said...

You forgot
never trust
- a car salesman
- anyone taking things out of a refrigerator and smelling them while saying 'here smell this'.

- the person saying 'what could go wrong?'

Anonymous said...

Sounds like you ran into my brother in law!

No, wait...

He's still in prison.

Rick said...

Never trust anyone over 60 (modified from the original 30 and bound to be modified again very, very soon).

rennratt said...

Never trust an adult that a small child doesn't like.

Never trust people in positions of political power.

tiff said...

ALWAYS trust? Your lover. Ya just gotta, you know?

Never trust the person behind the hotel desk who says "there are no rooms left," for there is ALWAYS at least one room.

Kingfisher said...

If we could *always* trust our lovers, there would be no such thing as break-ups, condoms, or Jerry Springer.

There is nothing you can always trust except apathy and the Grim Reaper.

tiff said...

oh KF - you're such a grump.

FINE, be that way, don't trust your lover.

You can't trust apathy either. SOmetimes apathy is just laziness in costume.